I see this phrase tossed around a lot, and it often becomes a reason for us to distance ourselves from Jesus Christ.
LISTEN: church hurt is real. If you’re a breathing child of God, you’ve experienced it or you will one day. Point blank. But what else is real and necessary?
The power of the Holy Ghost to overcome it is real. Receive the Holy Ghost or be stirred up.
Personal responsibility to walk up to a brother or sister and say, “hey, you hurt me. I love you. I forgive you.” By the way, don’t try and chew a person out and roast them about their wrongdoing. Just say those exact words, and let GOD do the rest.
If your coworker hurts you, do you quit your job? No. You show up the next day and somehow figure out how to work together because you need that money. Fall in love with GOD so much that your need for Him supersedes the temporary annoyance you’ll have to push through to overcome the hurt.
Praise harder. If someone hurts you, I dare you to pray more, leap for joy harder, sing until your lungs hurt, and smile. GOD inhabits the praises of His people. Let praise become your dwelling place.
Do NOT give yourself permission to wallow in your hurt or talk about the hurt or gossip about the hurt. Lay it on the altar daily. Be an adult and fight that demon. Some people have been stuck in the prison of church hurt for 10 years or more, and that’s exactly where the devil wants you to be.
If you think you deserve revenge for what what they did to you, try to imagine Jesus thinking that as He hung on the cross for YOUR sins. He took whips and shame because He always saw the bigger picture. “Father, forgive them because they know not what they do.”
Never assume people know that they hurt you. If you didn’t take time to have a healthy conversation and mention it, then always strive to think the best toward your brother or sister in Christ.
Jesus said if you love those who only love you back, then you’re no better than the world. To be like Jesus, to conform to His image, you MUST love those who hurt you the most.
Pray for your enemies. Genuinely and daily pray God’s blessing and restoration on them.
Always consider yourself. You will hurt someone. Or you already have. May they be easy to forgive you as you forgive others. The hurt may not fade away immediately, but keep striving to do these things, to be like Christ, and the Holy Ghost will heal all. And keep healing you. I’m a witness!
Lastly, the hurt will make your stronger, wiser, and more empathetic toward the broken if you handle it in a Godly way. I promise.
Kim Noble Calhoun